I used to BEAT myself up.
For not working more.
“I could be more effective!”
The results I did not produce.
And then there is my hubs and kids.
I should spend more time with Jon. Have more dates!
Juvia’s Chinese needs more work.
I should be more patient with Sol.
It is easy for me to jump on the hamster wheel and go DO DO DO!
Never mind how I feel.
And of course, I burn out.
This year, I am learning to be kinder, gentler to myself. Ya I have to learn lah, bit silly to repeat the same cycle.
So whenever I feel out of sorts, or overwhelmed, I jump off the hamster wheel!
I tell myself – It’s always there, don’t worry. It won’t disappear. I can always come back to it.
How does being gentler to myself look like? Here’s one story.
Last Wed, I was feeling especially hectic. There is laundry, cooking and then I have stuff I wanna do for my business!
I can feel myself PUNCHEK (like a flat tire) liao.
Where is that holiday when I need it!
It was only 7.50 am and I didn’t want the rest of my day to be the same way. Crabby woman tends to scare off the other Teos in the house.
(This is where Jon would attempt to give me space to rest by saying, “Eh kids, if you don’t want to die, come with me! NAAOOOO.” Optional: Frantic waving of hands like shepherd to shee-, I mean lambs.)
So ok! This is Faith’s attempt at MINDFULNESS. Never mind that I’m standing near my seasonings in the kitchen.
I used the oils as shown. Inhale. Exhale.
Played my favourite music.
Wiggled my butt.
SING! (Neighbours, aren’t you lucky to hear me WARBLE at the kitchen windows?)
Hanging the laundry after that, didn’t feel so bad after all.